News

I know, that I had abandon my blog for too long
more than a month I suppose
anyhow, I'm now coming back here
not to talk much, just some update

yeah, I passed my driving test on 6th of Jul
and got my driving license on the very next day
I was exciting and now found it not
it happens when your family don't even allowed you to drive much, and never let you drive alone, not even around your house
so ..
you know

the next thing is, I am now in my sister bf place, with his family
I am going to stuck, no, stay here for 4 months
I am seriously honestly dunno how to get along with the senior
and when they are my sister bf parent
it is even harder for me
they are surely very friendly, kind and treat me good
but then, it is still very weird for me to stay with them for these long
especially my sister is not around, and I am definitely not allowed to harsh people's feeling when this is not only matter to me, but to my own family too
of cause I don't mean I want to do that, just when things connected to my own family
I don't feel it is easy anymore, in fact, it becomes utterly difficult

besides that, I am going to start my internship tmr
yes ! tmr, omg I am very nervous, you can't imagine that
(of cause you can, many of you went through the same thing)
just I am worst at controlling my nerves
my hands are shaking
seriously shaking
and I dun feel right with my stomach all day long
I don't want the sky to turn dark, and now my room is getting darker
I don't know what to do tmr, I am just plain scared
don't know what should I do on the very first day
and will I make friends?
or the colleagues will just think that I am a totally idiot and ignore me?
bitching behind me?
or welcome me with open armed?
hope things will turn right tmr, I pray

and, I found that my health condition is getting worse day by day
therefore around 3 weeks ago I started to take healthier food, I drink fruit juices everyday
I add on a lot vege inside, something I don't even eat usually
and cut off the amount of meat I eat
still, I can't see myself getting stronger, but fatter


thanks to the vegetables and fruits

I hate them.